Jane Gilliam had nursed her husband through a long illness. He had asked to spend his last moments at their home. Being a nurse, a loving wife and mother, she promised him she would care for him until the end. It was very difficult. Jane held Tony’s hand as he took his final breath. Her husband passed away on April 19 this year
The end of a love so deep left Jane reaching for something to raise her up. She found climbing
Jane’s introduction to climbing came from her son, Jack, who has been climbing for the past two years at his local gym, The Climbing Hanger Plymouth, in England. Throughout his dad’s illness he had been his mum’s rock. He could see her grief, but he also knew her resilience
“I was a little bit apprehensive about taking Mum, but she’s a tough cookie. I know she’s got it in her to get back up and give things another go.”
Soon after Tony’s passing, Jack had a suggestion
“Mum, why don’t you come to the Plymouth Climbing Hangar with me and Molly (my girlfriend at the time), and have a free trial session?”
Jane had run several Plymouth Half Marathons, often raising money for charity. Running had been about giving back. With climbing, it became about finding wellbeing and an escape from her grief.Gripped asked Jane about taking that first step
“I thought about it and I figured, WHY NOT! I must admit I was very apprehensive as I didn’t want to make a fool of myself. I will be 59 years old in November and this ain’t tennis.”
As soon as she and Jack arrived she recognised something special
“When I walked in everyone was so friendly, welcoming and encouraging. The gym had such a fabulous vibe.”
Her first experience climbing was wonderful and she found herself smiling again. After the year she had endured, and holding onto her husband until his last breath, her spirit was bruised. Now, amongst the walls and chalk bags, she felt lighter
“I really enjoyed the free trial session. It was great fun and I was so impressed to see all ages of our community there.”
Jack admitted he wasn’t convinced she would actually go
“I thought she was joking about going at first, but she surprised me by going. She’s been doing so well. I’m very proud of her.”
Jack had introduced his mum to a whole new world. So began a mother and son climbing story
They now climb together once a week and Jane also attends the Ladies Evening every Friday. Every climbing partnership develops trust, but theirs has become something deeper than the bond between climbing buddies. Months after losing Tony, climbing has given mother and son a way to rebuild together
“It has been a hard year for both of us, but especially Mum with losing Dad. I think climbing at the gym has gotten both our minds off the loss and helps us both feel in control of how we deal with the grief. We can do it together.”
Jane has also found a community that has embraced her
“The ladies know my story and are so kind and friendly towards me. It’s a great social thing to do. The session is coach led and we all encourage each other. My peers have helped me by giving me support and tips.”
The introduction has now moved on to goals. Jane has lost weight, is toning up and getting stronger. She has feasted on the orange climbs, the easiest gym routes, but is now seeking out the blue routes and challenging herself to get amongst them
Beginning climbing comes with some caution. Throwing your body around above a crash pad doesn’t always land well for mature beginners. Jane, being a registered nurse, is well aware of that
“I always do a warm up. Jack and I stretch our legs and arms prior to climbing and, of course, we always have at least a ten minute warm up before the Ladies session starts.”
Jane says climbing has strengthened her in ways that go well beyond the physical
“I am a determined person and climbing has definitely helped me become a lot stronger, both mentally and physically. Climbing has assisted me cope with some very demanding and stressful situations I have found myself in recently.”
She also treasures the time she now spends with her son
“I feel completely relaxed in the gym. Jack is experienced so he encourages me and we just have fun, lots of laughs. I always come away from the gym feeling energised, happy and stronger, if a little tired!”
Jack has watched those changes unfold
“I feel exercise can really bring people together and make them mentally stronger. Certainly that has happened here anyway.”
In the beginning Jane nursed a few bruises and weathered some falls but, thanks to her running days, her calf muscles are well developed. She believes she has good upper body strength too, but knows her limits
“If I feel I can’t reach the top of the wall, I will climb down.”
Jane’s goals are to keep climbing, build her fitness and strength, and climb more difficult routes in the gym. Her message to other mature people thinking about giving climbing a try is simple
“DON’T KNOCK IT UNTIL YOU’VE TRIED IT!!! This is my own personal motto for life
Whoa, even Jane stirs my stoke. Gripped asked Jane whether she was becoming curious about heading outdoors?
“Yes, I probably will give outdoor climbing a go at some stage. Watch this space.”
For now, the gym is enough
“We have the moors on our doorstep, but unlike the gym it’s hard to know where to start. We don’t really know where to go. Climbing at the gym is just easier for the meantime.”
We at Gripped wish Jane a safe and exciting climbing journey. We are sure Tony is looking down, proud as punch, watching his loving wife discover that climbing has given her far more than strength. It has helped her find her footing again
