Column signature by Troy Becker
ByCarol Bradley Bursack
Today at 10:00 AM
Dear Carol: Why do people get less inclined to bathe or shower daily as they get older? My dad, who used to shower religiously every morning, is much less inclined now that he’s in his 70s. He doesn’t smell bad, but I’ve read about how older people get so they fight bathing later in life, so I’m worried that this will get worse. I don’t want to jump ahead of people with serious questions, but I really want to know. My internet search gives me all kinds of random answers, from saying it’s normal and not a problem to the start of dementia. What is your take? – DA
Dear DA: You are sweet to be proactive and concerned about your dad, but this seems to be a case of too much information from people who feel the need to make a point, while skipping nuance. I’ll start by saying that it’s likely that you have nothing to worry about
Some of what you read may be driven by ageist stereotypes and clickbait, but some of it can be based on truth. While your dad is doing fine, this may be a red flag for others. Is the person just rolling with what they feel is right for their skin health and social life, or are they neglecting other aspects of hygiene and self-care?
Realistically, unless an older person has been very active, they probably won’t need a daily bath or shower. With more fragile, dry skin, a general washup in between shower days might be healthiest
Additionally, family might notice times when the older adult isn’t smelling too fresh on a random day but is generally fine. There could be many reasons for this. Perhaps they simply had an unusually challenging arthritis day
Or at the other extreme, maybe they had a stellar day and have been out working in the yard for hours, with a shower next on the agenda. So, avoid being judgmental. It’s only a problem if pragmatic changes in hygiene habits deteriorate into self-neglect
Worried relatives should start by considering why
- Is there evidence of depression? A visit with the doctor is in order.
- Does the person feel a loss of control? Make sure family members aren’t overstepping boundaries.
- Boredom: Without enough to do, why bother? That’s often not just an older adult’s mindset; it can be universal.
- A deteriorating sense of smell may make some people less rigorous when it comes to personal hygiene.
- Fear, pain, chills: Older adults might be experiencing increased pain, feeling dizzy from medications, or finding showers too chilling for an aging system. If you genuinely want to help, there are workarounds.
- Cognitive impairment complicates the issue. Showers and bathing can be major concerns for dementia caregivers.
DA, if you witness any of these changes in your dad, have compassionate conversations with him to see if he needs some help. Until then, be grateful that he’s sharp enough to adjust his life to suit his needs
By
Carol Bradley Bursack
Carol Bradley Bursack, a certified dementia support group facilitator, has provided care for multiple family members. She’s also an author, newspaper columnist, consultant, and blog host at www.mindingoureldersblog.com. Carol can be reached by using the contact form at www.mindingourelders.com.
Health
Clinical trial participation playing key role in advancing science
35m ago
· By Dené K. Dryden
Lifestyle
Two-headed coneflower is a mutation triggered by environment
1h ago
· By Don Kinzler
Lifestyle
From 1995: Norway’s royals greeted with pomp, shrill winds in Fargo-Moorhead
2h ago
· By Ellen Crawford
Get Local
‘;
let script = document.createElement(“script”);
script.setAttribute(“data-widget-type”, “featured_jobs”);
script.setAttribute(“src”, “//widgets.recruitology.com/scripts/” + jobshqID +”.js”);
document.getElementById(“jobsHQ-hotjobs-list”).appendChild(script);
}
}
init()
Lifestyle
From 1995: Norway’s royals greeted with pomp, shrill winds in Fargo-Moorhead
2h ago
· By Ellen Crawford
Arts and Entertainment
As country fest returns to The Lights, promoter looks to expand bookings to other stages
1d ago
· By John Lamb
Business
From cottage baker to brick-and-mortar: Gluten-free bakery to hold September grand opening
1d ago
· By Tammy Swift
Prep
Horace fends off late Red River push to secure season-opening victory
11h ago
· By Ryan Spitza
